I’m currently typing this while you’re cuddled up in my arms. Your little hand is resting gently on my chest and the weight of it rakes my breath away. It reminds me that despite how incredible, gorgeous and amazing you are, you’re real! I keep waiting to wake up and realize it’s all a dream because life seems just too good to be true.
This space has become more important this week as someone broke into our house Thursday night and stole my laptop before Lily scared them away. I couldn’t care less about an inanimate object, grateful that we are ok and things weren’t worse. But I do wish I could get back the thousands of pictures on there of you and your brother and the countless journal entries I wrote from before you were even born. The cliff note version is that up you were loved beyond words before you even entered the world 🙂
You’ve started cooing and almost talking so much this month! You coo at me with an intense look in your eyes and I coo back. You respond with a giant gummy smile that melts my heart. You smile and laugh in your sleep a lot and I wonder what you could possibly be dreaming of. Probably Jackson or nursing. Yesterday for the first time you laughed while awake! I tickled you and you let out the most adorable giggle. It melted my heart.
You have the absolute most amazing personality. You’re sweet as can be, extremely easygoing and happy 99% of the time. You’re completely content strolling along on my runs, watching me cook from your rock n play, playing on your activity mat watching big brother jump around dangerously close to your head and being Ergo-ed around town running errands, going to big boy play dates and exploring local parks. I can’t get over how adaptable you are.
We spend most of big brothers nap times on the living room chair. I prop you up on my legs and we spend half of naptime making faces at one another, smiling and singing. Your favorite song is “Twinkle Twinkle” and it never fails to make you smile. It makes me wonder if you have a hearing problem 😉 the other half of nap time you snooze off in my arms, usually nursing. I always swear to nap while both of you are down but instead get lost staring at your little body wrapped around my torso, gently snoring. I love it. In this crazy life that flies by far too fast, where you grow in the blink of an eye, I’m trying desperately to cherish these fleeting moments as best I can. Before I know it you’ll be too big and too busy to cuddle.
Last week we visited your great aunt and uncle at their amazing land in virginia. You went through a growth spurt while there and I swear you doubled in size. Your grandma has been in Italy for the past 2 weeks and gets back tonight. She’s not going to recognize you! In other news you went to the gym daycare for the first time this week so I could try to get back into body pump. You were a champ, as always and slept the entire time. I love how easy it is for you to coordinate schedules no matter how frequently they change. I fed you and we cuddled and played until right before class began and then you happily slept in your car seat for the hour I was gone. I missed you the entire time but it was so nice to feel the burn again and get in some much needed strength training. I still have a hard time leaving you. You’re still so little.
Your eyes are still a mix of steely blue and this amazing gold color around your pupils. It’s electrifying. I have a feeling you may be a little brown eyed baby one day and I couldn’t be happier. I love you just the way you are.
In all, I’m still in awe of you and cannot believe I’m the lucky woman to be your mommy and watch you grow every day. You’re such a blessing. I love you more than words could ever express.